It's been a while since I've written publically, but this has been on my heart for a while.  Even now, I'm not sure if it's correct theologically but I thought I would write it down anyway.  Maybe someone will read this and either question or clarify for me, what I've been thinking about recently.

I start with this scripture after Jesus has washed the feet of the disciples:

John 13:13-17

13 “You call me ‘Teacher’ and ‘Lord,’ and rightly so, for that is what I am. 14 Now that I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also should wash one another’s feet. 15 I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you. 16 Very truly I tell you, no servant is greater than his master, nor is a messenger greater than the one who sent him. 17 Now that you know these things, you will be blessed if you do them.

Verse 15 caught my eye one day because I was pondering an entirely different subject - and as I did, I remembered this verse:  "I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you."

Why is this scripture so important to me?

Because of this verse:

Mathew 28:16-20

Then the eleven disciples went to Galilee, to the mountain where Jesus had told them to go.17 When they saw him, they worshiped him; but some doubted. 18 Then Jesus came to them and said,“All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. 19 Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, 20 and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.”

First of all - you might think I'm weird, but I like the scripture that says in verse 17 the disciples worshiped - "...but some doubted".  Pretty interesting to think you can still doubt and worship God at the same time.  I'm sure there would be those who would argue that it's not "true worship", but what the heck is?  Let's be honest.  How many people can truly worship God with absolutely NOTHING ELSE trying to crowd into the mind at the same time? Worry, doubt, fear, boredom, feeling aloof, depressed, etc. It's a constant battle to discipline the mind to quiet these and concentrate on the goodness of God.  So I like this verse because it's a HUMAN thing to do -worship and have some conflicting emotion that is opposite of worship.

And the other cool thing is Jesus didn't point it out.  In past scriptures we can read things like:  "Knowing what they were thinking, he [Jesus] said..."  But this time - He didn't point out the doubt or question their hearts or give one last parable.

Instead, He told them something greater - something that would eventually turn doubt into belief; He could already see the Day of Pentecost, where the disciples doubts taken away, as well as all those who heard their testimonies and believed in Jesus Christ - resurrected - Son of God - their Savior.

He tells them something that so many of us can quote with our eyes closed:
"Go and make disciples of all nations..."

I'm going to stop there because this is the true crux of what I'm thinking about right now. As I've reflected on these scriptures and the following thoughts, it took a lot of shame and guilt away.

The scripture says:  "Go and make disciples..."  not "Go and make converts..."

What's the difference?

It's a HUGE difference.

I don't know how you were raised in your upbringing, but I was raised to believe that I needed to tell everyone about Jesus and His saving power. Only, it wasn't in a way that supported long-term relationship building, but more like "Smack a stranger in the head and dog him into becoming a Christian, otherwise he's going to hell and you helped him go there."

I never understood this theology and as time went on I was afraid for those who became "Christians" by such means, because the one who lead the other "to the Lord" goes away proud and a little less guilt ridden because he or she accomplished the "task" that needed to be done (according to their denomination's practices) and the new "convert" has no clue what happened, or how to be discipled . He or she was lead in the "sinners prayer" - then watched the other one walk away.

Creating spiritual orphans was never Jesus idea of following Him.

I didn't get it.  Why "lead someone to Christ", and then walk away?

My denomination heavily touted bringing people to Christ, and then glossed over what to do after that.

"Invite them to church!" they'd say.  Well, that 's a first step, but even then it's not promising.  Nothing like having a total stranger say, "Hey, where do you live? I'll come pick you up!"

Ummm...no thank you, stranger. I barely know you, and right now, I barely know Jesus. 

[Think about it. No matter how grateful you might be to the man or woman who stops your child and leads him or her to Christ, would you be cool if this same person asks for an address and a phone number where he or she could be reached?  Sadly enough, there's enough wolves in sheep(s) clothing to look like a saint but act like a devil.  Stranger danger is still stranger danger.]

So what in the world am I suppose to do? I don't want to abandon anyone - I don't want to make them feel uncomfortable by offering to bring them to church - and I'm not sure they'd come any way by themselves...

...sigh.

It wasn't till I read the above verses back to back, did I finally get it.

I started pondering, "What examples did Jesus do that I need to follow in His footsteps with?"

And I came up with the following:

• First - Jesus never chased anyone